If you choose to go with premium paysites over tubesites, there are other options.
Clips4Sale, iWantClips, ManyVids, and other clipstores let fans of creators buy their homemade clips. This is an experience for those who:
want to see more of a particular creator
have a specific fetish that’s hard to find
prefer premium, well-made amateur clips over “set the camera up and hit record”
are worried about consent in the free videos they watch
want to join a community that embraces their kinks
enjoy custom-made videos that fulfill a specific fantasy that free porn can’t
and many other reasons
On top of that, there are subscription sites like OnlyFans, LoyalFans, and Fansly. This is for fans who like an amateur enough to pay a monthly fee to chat, view daily content, and keep up with their favorite pornstar.
Also, niche sites like SextPanther or NiteFlirt exist for phone sex, sexting, sharing nudes, etc.
Because there are so many options, amateur porn creators are welcome to choose their own path. You may prefer one over the other. All of them are lucrative.
I’m on most of these sites, and I have no issue with making money. For me, it’s about creating a kinky experience and welcoming my fans with similar fetishes into my space.
If free porn floats your boat, that’s great! But for those in search of something specific that free can’t satisfy, we adult content creators are always happy to fill in the gaps.
There seems to be a fairly large BDSM community who loves this site. After doing some exploring, I see a forum, a feed for writing tasks, and explore pages.
Write For Me seems to revolve around female domination and similar tasks for submissives. However, I do see other communities budding in the forums.
I suggest exploring to see what it has to offer.
A couple of my male subs helped me test it out, and it seems legit! I’m always looking for new ways to occupy that weak subby mind. I’m happy with it so far.
How to Use WriteForMe for Submissive Tasks
So far, I’ve created three public tasks on WriteForMe:
1. The task setter creates a prompt. The prompt may include:
Lines, anywhere from 1 to an unknown amount.
Punishments for mistakes and interruptions.
Interruptions to distract from the task.
A reward at the end.
2. The typer then types the exact words on the prompt and completes the task.
3. The task setter chooses whether to get an email from the typer’s completed work.
Plus, the typer gets to deliver a private message and their reward.
It’s easy and fun. So far, I’ve been using it in many ways to keep my male subs occupied.
Read more about my plans for WriteForMe in the next section.
Demonstrate Your Loyalty: My Plans
A site that’s so versatile makes my creativity start blooming. Here’s what I have so far.
A Male Sub’s Proof of Dedication
I get dozens of messages daily from potential submissives. It’s hard to distinguish the real male subs from fake ones.
With WriteForMe, demonstrate your commitment to me by completing simple (or difficult) writing tasks for submissives. It’s a great way for you to show me upfront that you are worthy.
Submissive Tasks for Punishment (and Funishment)
My other plan for WriteForMe involves punishment. Unworthy or disobedient submissives will have to complete these writing tasks if they want to keep access to me.
I will not make them easy.
How I plan to use WriteForMe for punishments:
Lengthy lines and writing prompts
Humiliating interruptions
Harsh punishments for mistakes
Strict rules to follow
Failing to complete these submissive tasks come with consequences. If you don’t want to risk losing access to me, be a good boy, or complete your punishment.
My Favorites: Manipulation, Chastity, Cuckold, and Mind Control
I’ve also been using WriteForMe to act out my favorite fetishes. Manipulation, mind control, and daily mantras are so easy to set.
It’s an easier way for me to set submissive tasks for daily mantras and monitor your progress.
Typically, my mantras are shorter with few interruptions. I want my submissives to focus on the mantra itself, not worrying about mistakes.
Join Me on WriteForMe
If you are looking for a way to demonstrate your commitment as my submissive, I present you with WriteForMe.
Which adult site is best for subscribers, LoyalFans or OnlyFans? While OnlyFans gets 3.84 billion visits a year, some fan sites outshine it with a better user experience. We’ll answer the LoyalFans vs OnlyFans debate before you buy a subscription to either.
Here, you’ll see the perspective of an adult content creator who’s used both fan sites. I’ll give you the gory details, behind the scenes knowledge, and my opinion for which fansite is best.
Keep reading to learn more.
What Is LoyalFans?
Much like OF, LoyalFans is a subscription porn site. Porn creators control their individual posts, tailored to you and your interests. The benefits include:
keeping up with your favorite adult content creators,
One of your main questions may be, is LoyalFans legit? My short answer is yes. They process payments quickly, always pay me on time, keep your credit card safe, and don’t sell your information to third parties. Most importantly, they’re not a scam; they are legit!
What’s the difference: LoyalFans vs OnlyFans?
There are many, but the main thing I’ve observed is user experience. LF as an OnlyFans alternative is 1000 times easier to manage and navigate. As a subscriber, you have more control over finding and subscribing to 18+ profiles with LF’s unique search tools.
As of this post, you can:
Browse recently updated xxx profiles
See which models are popular or trending
Buy individual xxx clips (much like PPV) in a dedicated video store with varietywithout subscribing to the creator too!
Buy erotic audio directly from adult content creators without subscribing
Follow most xxx accounts for free
Message amateurs and pornstars without subscribing (depends on their settings)
Enjoy fetish-friendly FemDom and kinks without worrying about losing the content
How Many Adult Content Creators Use LoyalFans vs OnlyFans?
There are a little over 2 million creators on Only Fans. That’s an impressive number, seeing how some of the older pornsites I’m on barely break 200,000 amateurs. Quantity is a good thing, but what’s better? In my opinion, quality trumps quantity.
I could not find an exact number of adult models on LF. (I’m ballparking, but I’m thinking tens of thousands, if not hundreds of thousands.)
As a model myself, I can tell you that the “Recently Updated” page refreshes with multiple new models every minute. It’s not a dead website, and if you’re lucky enough to come across a dedicated model, you should expect frequent spicy pictures, videos, audio, and messages.
Many Celebrities Use OnlyFans
Out of pure honesty, I will say this. Not many celebrities use LoyalFans as opposed to OnlyFans. Since it is such a popular website, you’re less likely to see a celebrity on LF. You might miss accounts like Blac Chyna, Amber Rose, or Mia Khalifa.
If you aren’t subscribed to celebrities, that’s not much of a problem. But, it is something to consider if that’s your dealbreaker in looking for an OnlyFans alternative.
On the other hand, famous pornstars are on LF. Some of them are exclusive, and you won’t be able to subscribe to their premium services anywhere else.
and many others use the subscription service regularly.
What Kind of Adult Content Is on LF?
View the LoyalFans interface before signing up. You can see the model’s profile picture, description, fans, banner, and scroll for free and locked posts.
Here’s where the difference between LoyalFans and OnlyFans really starts to show. Only Fans is very “social media” based, where amateurs, pornstars, and celebrities sell commodity with NSFW sprinkled in. If you subscribe to the wrong celebrity, there’s a chance you’ll never see a nipple, let alone a full nude.
An OnlyFans alternative is a good choice if you’re looking for real, hot porn. LoyalFans claims to be kink and fetish friendly, embracing their role as a vector for adult content. They don’t hide it, ban models for being nude and kinky, or punish subscribers for wanting to see some pussy.
That being said, the alternate pornsite is heavily kink-based. You should expect to see things like:
FemDom and FinDom
Real Pornstars
Real Camgirls
Amateur Creators
BDSM
Gooner and Edging
Ass Play and Anal
MILF
Cuckold and Cheating Fantasy
Foot Models
All Body Types, Male and Female, etc.
and MUCH more…
Don’t Like FemDom or Fetish Content?
Is female domination not your thing? Are you on the vanilla spectrum without any big fetishes? That’s okay! It’s still possible to find softcore or vanilla content on LoyalFans. It will take some digging, but that’s what their handy-dandy Search and Recently Updated tools are for.
For example, I use LF as my space for exclusive FemDom content. However, I often lace my profile with less kinky content. That includes regular nudes, tit pics, pussy, dirty talk, and solo female masturbation. It’s truly a space for everyone to enjoy.
Plus, don’t knock it until you try it. Female domination is fucking sexy. *wink wink*
If you’re a big fan of female domination, then the LoyalFans vs OnlyFans question is an easy answer. You’ll find the FemDom of your dreams on the alternate fansite much quicker.
Live Real Camgirls on LoyalFans vs OnlyFans
OF does have a way to view your individual creator’s live shows. You have to look out for their announcement and be online at the right time. It’s tedious to navigate and outdated. What if you wanted to watch a girl’s naughty camshow now?
Firstly, LF outshines them with easily searchable live camgirls. In fact, the newer subscription fan site has a way to browse live camgirls with no limits, pop into rooms for free, and enjoy the show. You may have to subscribe if she wants to get naughtier in private. But, that’s better than waiting for your one creator to get online and start camming.
Finally, LoyalFans also gives subscribers the option to video call or phone call amateurs, or you can take them to private if they’re on live webcam.
Should You Try LoyalFans as an OnlyFans Alternative?
Whether you should stick with OnlyFans or create a LoyalFans account depends on you. Personally, I believe that LoyalFans is the better alternative to OnlyFans because of the features alone. If you need more points to consider, think of this:
OnlyFans creators get removed 24/7 for no reason.
If a creator gets banned, you lose their content. Yes, even their PPV you spent $40 on.
There is no way to subscribe to new porn models that doesn’t include social media.
If an OF account doesn’t have a free option, you have to subscribe to follow them.
versus free to follow on most LoyalFans accounts.
With over 200 million users on OF, you have a lot of competition to get a model’s attention.
Or, it’s impossible to get her attention and she uses a management company (most common with celebrities)
Quality over quantity
Stick With OnlyFans, and You Might Miss Out
OnlyFans is the number one place to enjoy premium adult content. Yes, itmay have a cleaner build, but it’s quickly becoming outdated by fansites with newer features. In the LoyalFans vs OnlyFans debate, discovery features are necessary. Mostly, they help you keep you in touch with who’s new and find underground amateurs.
You don’t want to miss out on the hottest new model while she’s still new, right? You deserve to find your hidden gem and spoil her to oblivion.
Don’t miss out. Also, don’t lose your PPV when a model gets deleted, or lose track of your favorites. If you’re ready to try something new, start with LoyalFans.
Hey, Future Subscriber! Thanks for Reading.
You made it all the way through my long-winded post. For that, you deserve a gold star. Sign up to LoyalFans via this link, and send me a direct message. Then, tell me that you came from this blog post, and I’ll send you a free xxx video as a thank you.
Are you talking about subscriptions, PPV, unlocks, services, or tips?
Either way, it all boils down to the same thing. Attract your ideal fan. If you’re getting cheap clients who want to pay $3 for a subscription and get everything else for free, and that bothers you as a creator, then your branding needs to change.
How to know more about your target audience.
Ask yourself:
When are they online?
What are their hobbies?
Where do they work?
How old are they?
Where will they find you?
What do they like about you and your content?
Are they looking for something specific?
Just answering a few of these gives you the insight to put yourself in the right place at the right time.
Once you find that ideal fan, they’re more likely to spend money than a random who stumbled across your link and got curious.
How to engage your fans on OnlyFans
After you’ve converted a fan, it’s important to recognize their style.
Are they worth your time? Will they spend more money? Do they respect your rules? I wouldn’t waste time on someone who’s asking for discounts or failing to open a PPV message. They get sent to generic mass message hell very quickly lol.
However, when you find a potential spender, it’s time to put in work. Here’s what I do on other platforms:
Cater to them.
Learn about them.
Figure out why they’re interested in you.
Upsell with video bundles, custom content offers, sexting, etc.
Give them content that THEY are interested in, not just your latest uploads.
Send them personalized PPV, like audio or nude/lewd selfies.
Tell them that you appreciate their support. A simple thank you actually goes a long way.
How to (attempt) converting non-spenders
Some guys just want the subscription feed, and that’s it. It’ll be hard to convert them to anything else.
Using the same rules as engaging your ideal fan could work, but some guys just don’t get it lol. They either don’t feel the need for the personalized experience, or it flies over their head.
But, here are some more ideas I’ve used to convert non-spenders:
For them, you REALLY have to stand out with something original. Consider them the “infinite scrollers”. Break their mindless scrolling with something that pops out at them.
Ask them authentic questions about themselves. When you get an answer, try to feel them out and gauge their interests.
If they’re a never-ending chatter who’s not unlocking your messages, ignore them or tell them you’ll be slow to answer because you’re talking to paying customers.
Sometimes, you have to start with $1-$2 PPV with them to get them spending. I wouldn’t put too much thought or value into something that cheap, but it’s a good way to engage them.
I’ve seen some Dommes say that calling them out helps LOL, but that’s not my style.
Maybe consider pricing the low spenders out.
The results of this vary. Personally, I raised my prices on other platforms and got better clients. I’ve heard a handful of other creators say the same. And for many, this doesn’t work.
You could price out the low spenders with a higher subscription fee. However, if your entire following is cheap, you won’t get any new subs until you start targeting the right audience.
The kink is popular because a lot of women believe that it’s free/easy money. They snap their fingers and expect to be paid. While that is the nature of the fetish, it’s a lot more than what meets the eye.
Research BDSM. Understand the root of the fetish you want to provide. Figure out what attracts finsubs, paypigs, human wallets, financial service subs. Hint: It’s not just “f- you, pay me”.
Create content that resonates with your take on FinDom, not because it’s popular, but because you want to attract potential finsubs that prioritize your needs.
These were the top 10 most popular payment methods during March.
Put yourself in the right spaces. The point of doing so is to learn about FinDom, and attract subs that you’d allow to serve you. Putting on a persona isn’t a good idea; imo it leads to burnout quickly.
Letting your naturally Dominant, feminine energy shine yields the most success. Haven’t explored your inner Domme before?
I’d suggest learning what you want and prioritizing your wants above all else. If all else fails, dealing with swarms of timewasters will make or break your ability to say “You’re not worth my time. Goodbye.”
In the Mood to Make Your Paycheck Mine?
I’ll gladly take that cash out of your hands.
I promise, I’m much better at spending it than you are. Be a good boy, and fill up my bank account.
It all boils down to which site you want to buy porn from.
The most common payment method is Mastercard and Visa. However, most adult sites take other payment methods.
Nowadays, you can use crypto or a debit card for most adult sites.
Depending on your country, some paid porn sites offer Giropay (Germany), EPS (Austria), and iDeal (Netherlands).
Some sites also offer their own prepaid cards, such as ClipCash for Clips4Sale.
It depends on the site whether or not you’ll be able to use PayPal, and I wouldn’t expect that to last for long. But, I know that FapHouse takes it.
New subs might be hesitant to sign up for adult sites. People worry about the safety of their credit card, and that’s understandable. Most adult content creators have multiple ways to pay.
All of the creators on the site are verified via ID and a photo. They use a legitimate payment processor as well. I’ve been using LoyalFans since August, and they’ve always paid me on-time and in full.
What Payment Methods Do I Take?
I encourage potential fans and submissive men to visit my paysites. They all take the most popular payment methods.
I avoid PayPal and Venmo because of their likelihood to ban models for selling adult content.
Not everybody is brave enough to share their naughty kinks and fetishes face to face. So, what’s the next best thing? Premium sexting sites are the perfect, anonymous way to find a sexting partner fast.
Sending a dirty text is the best way to communicate your sexual desires.
Who doesn’t love sexting? It’s surprisingly intimate, passes the time when you’re bored, and you get to dive deep into a fantasy. You get to explore yourselves and each other without the full pressure of a sexual encounter.
There are plenty of websites to look for a quick dirty chat. But the top premium sexting sites for men include:
A lot of men turn up their noses at the thought of paying. That’s valid! You want to feel desirable enough for women to want you without your money involved.
But, I want to emphasize that it’s not about desire, or your levels of attractiveness, or you as a person. The benefits of free vs. paid sexting are simple when you put it in the right perspective.
You want somebody to text *now*.
If you’re in a rush and don’t have a partner, it’s hard to find women to sext. You have to hop on Tinder, Bumble, or any other dating site; go through that nightmare; and when you finally get a match, she’s not down for anything immediate.
Premium sexting is a way to get what you want fast. Most adult content creators offer sexting services, and it’s as easy as clicking a button.
Experience with kinks, fetishes, and fantasies.
You may have found a partner to sext, but is she in the mood? Does she share the same sexual quirks as you? Did she reject one of your more kinky offers?
Models who offer pay-to-sext are lenient, and they usually include a list of kinks and fetishes on their bio or tip menu. You don’t have to guess what she’s into. It’s right there in an easy-to-read format.
Also, her experience with the kink or fetish could introduce you to something new and sexy. She doesn’t have to fake it for your sake.
No strings attached sexting
When two people spend a lot time getting to know each other, things happen. This causes a lot of anxiety for people who just want to have fun. If things between you and your old texting partner, premium sexting might be the better option.
Professional adult content creators avoid catching feelings. They won’t start blowing up your phone asking where you’ve been or who you’re with. Outside of targeted messages to get you to come back for a fun time, they most likely won’t bother you.
Note: If you’re looking to build a relationship, paid sexts aren’t the right call.
On the other hand, there is the possibility for you to catch feelings. No strings attached goes both ways. It’s okay to foster a genuine connection to boost the fantasy, but it shouldn’t be taken too far. If you’re going to use pay-to-play adult sites, the professionalism goes both ways.
How to Use OnlyFans to Sext Online
One of the top paid websites for a quick sexting session is OnlyFans. While it’s common for users to subscribe, scroll, and log off; there’s the possibility to get more out of your subscription.
When it comes to It’s easy to use, and popular, and most women on the site offer free or paid sexts. You can initiate, and they’ll immediately get the message. No bullshit or beating around the bush; send a quick xxx message any of your favorite OnlyFans girls.
However, a strong fear exists in many members. They’re worried that the model isn’t who she says she is, and it’s a possibility. It’s common for OnlyFans girls with huge followings to hire management companies or assistants to answer their messages. Soon, I’ll show you ways to bypass your fears and prove you’re speaking to the real model.
If OnlyFans isn’t your thing, read about more options below.
SextPanther: The Fast Sexting Site With Real Pornstars
Plenty of xxx websites let you sext online. But, it’s about finding the quickest, best session for your money. For example, my favorite site is SextPanther where I share my naughty fantasies with other horny members.
On SextPanther, you and the model (usually a popular pornstar!) share texts, videos, audio, and pictures. It’s great for getting in touch with highly desired women whose inboxes are flooded due to their popularity.
When you deliver a message on SP, you get to the top of an SP creator’s DM’s for fast replies, and she sees that you’re serious about her.
Why do I consider SextPanther to be a great option for a quick, dirty chat? Every piece of media that is shared, you get to keep. If you like to collect nudes or xxx videos, they stay on your account forever. Unlike Snapchat, you get to look back on your old nudes and enjoy them forever.
The majority of the pornstars and camgirls are fetish and kink friendly too. I’m included in that list. I love the freaks; they’re the most fun.
Every camgirl, pornstar, and adult content creator is a 100% verified model via ID. They also need a decent social media following for approval. For example, they approved me (I assume!) because of my RedGifs Creator of theMonth title, as well as my decent following on Twitter, Chaturbate, and ManyVids. Because of those rules, there’s a higher ratio of real adult stars on SextPanther, compared to other pay to sext websites.
To me, that makes it one of the best sexting sites for men with particular fetishes, nude collectors, and casual chatters.
How to Prove She’s a Real Pornstar on SextPanther
As far as I know, few girls use management agencies on this pay-to-sext site. While *I* personally, don’t, I can’t speak for everyone. Here are some ways to prove that she’s real:
Relax, and realize that 100% of the horny girls on SP are ID verified (it’s the law) and ready for you.
Do Verified Models Use Other Sexting Sites?
While SextPanther is a place to reach me fast, I also sext on LoyalFans. Most other models and I allow subscribers to message for free. In this case, it may be a cheaper option for committed sexters.
If you don’t want a premium subscription just to send a sext online, most LoyalFans creators allow their free followers to chat. Whatever your preference, there’s an option out there catered for you.
Do You Recommend Other Sexting Sites?
While SextPanther is one of the best sexting websites, I have heard of others. Some I can recommend, and others I have no experience. I will not recommend a site that I’m inexperienced with, but I can point you in the right directly. However, they all seem trustworthy if you’re concerned about privacy.
Selling sexting services on ManyVids is less popular, but it’s possible. You can navigate to an MV Girl’s Items Store if you want to check for what she offers. I’ve only sexted a handful of guys there, so I’m not sure if that should be your first choice.
Arousr, Adult Friend Finder, and Jerkmate
When it comes to other sexting websites, I’ve personally never signed up for them. I’m unsure of their user experience or how guys feel about them. However, I am adding their names here just in case they interest you.
You might see something you like, who knows!
Live Camgirls Ready to Sext Now
Do you want to elevate your xxx messaging? Live cams support 100% anonymous sexting online, and you physically see exactly who you’re talking to.
While live cams aren’t specifically for sending sexts online, finding the right camgirl is life-changing. I suggest finding a room with fewer viewers, so you get the benefit of one-on-one attention.
There is an option on every live camsite to take the women to a private session. While she does her naughty thing, you can put dirty words in her chatroom to encourage her.
My favorite site is Chaturbate. As a camgirl, I love entertaining a room full of guys, but I don’t mind if one takes me to private. The one-on-one feels more intimate, and it’s sexier that way. It’s easier to focus on one guy’s kinks, and more fun to explore each other.
Models, Camgirls, Pornstars, and Content Creators; Sign up for SextPanther
If you’re interested in signing up for SextPanther as a model, pornstar, camgirl, or content creator; click my referral link. It doesn’t take any money out of your pocket, but it is a simple way to tell me thank you for the suggestion. 🙂
Keep in mind: SP wants you to have a good adult-oriented following before they’ll accept you. If you’ve grown a social media, OnlyFans, PornHub, or other adult website; you should good approved. However, sometimes they reject people for reasons unknown. I’m happy to discuss it with you before you sign up.
Cheating, not to be confused with cucking, is the act out going outside of your relationship to get emotional or sexual gratification. In the context of it being a kink or fetish, they get off on the idea of doing so.
It’s typical for people to sexualize the experiences they have in life. Going by that statement, it’s easy to see why someone may have a cheating fetish. Both women and men can have it.
Depending on why they do, it may be a type of power play or a way to deal with past events.
The attraction to a cheating fetish may include:
Secrecy
The idea of being caught
Revenge on your partner
Wandering eyes
There is a difference between having a kink/fetish and being an actual cheater. I’ve had single fans who got off on the idea of cheating.
The experience is more important in this context.
On the other hand, homewrecking is also a thing in the BDSM community. These types of people may seek out men/women with partners.
“But for some women, the taboo of somebody else’s partner cheating is a turn on. These women get off on being a so-called temptress, luring men away from their partners.” – Quote From Vice
Both are misconstrued and lumped in with cuckolding. Cucking is consensual. I’d lump cheating in with noncon in my opinion. This is something I’d like to discuss with other kinksters.
As a Domme, I shy away from cheating fetish, and it’s something I’ve been trying to learn how to turn it in my favor.
Mental Domination is my biggest turn on. I understand how cheating and Mental Domme-ing go hand in hand.
Every once in a while, I’ll get a fan. Like I said before, they’ll be single but get off on cheating. If in their minds, they’re prioritizing getting away with it without their partners knowing, then it’s a form of power exchange.
Despite it being shamed, and even normalized in society, that’s why I won’t partake with a sub I don’t trust.
The longer the relationship, the more comfortable I am with opening those doors.
Usually, I wait before joining shiny new sites. I want to make sure they’re sticking around. It’s also a safety thing for me. I won’t encourage my viewers and subs to join a new site without testing it myself.
Wishtender was good. Throne was great. I’m moving on to YouPay.
You can send me gift cards and cash. I can add whatever I want to my wishlist, and it doesn’t seem to be too strict.
It’s common for these wishlist-type sites to not allow adult services. But, if you wanted a custom video or other service, you’re welcome to ask.
The typical problem with these wishlist sites is Stripe. They are not 100% adult friendly. They will sweep things under the rug if we aren’t too obvious. So, we can keep it our little secret. 😉
If you’re in the mood to gift me, spoil me, or introduce yourself to your new Goddess; go ahead and send that tribute.
For a submissive male who’s new to the world of BDSM, finding answers is intimidating. Whether or not you are actually a sub is one of the first questions to ask.
Why do you fantasize about powerful women? Where will this preference lead you? How do you find the right Domme? All of these questions have an answer, and your journey to submission starts here.
On the bright side, there are millions of excellent resources available to help you explore your kinks. This guide, written by a female Domme in hopes that it crosses paths with an interested male sub, is one of them.
What Is the Definition of a Submissive Male?
A submissive male, also known as a “sub”, is a man who prefers to be subservient and obedience to their Domme. The act of submission is a form of BDSM (Bondage/discipline, Dominance/submission, Sadism/masochism).
A male submissive can come in all shapes and sizes, but it boils down to giving control to the Dominant partner.
It’s important to realize that submission to a partner does not equal femininity. Can a submissive be feminine? Yes. But, it’s not a requirement to do so. It’s less about the person’s gender identity and more about what they want sexually or in a relationship.
Anyone who can legally consent is able to submit, regardless of their sexuality or gender identity.
Is Being Submissive Online Authentic or Fake?
It is true that submission in real life is nuanced and complex. Think of it in terms of a long distance relationship. Despite there being miles between two partners, they still experience the feelings, commitment, and complexities of a relationship.
With a long-distance relationship still being valid to the two partners, comparing that to online submission is the easy way to say: Yes, submitting to a Domme virtually is valid. It takes just as much effort, and submissives who enjoy online interactions aren’t fake.
Most submissive males prefer talking to FemDoms virtually due to privacy, safety, and personal concerns.
For many, BDSM is taboo. Many people can’t live loud and proud with their kinks for various reasons. Those reasons may include:
A career demanding privacy
A community (family, friends, etc.) who wouldn’t accept it
Fear of being harshly judged or ostracized by their community
Fear of disappointing their loved ones
They don’t want others to see them as a weak or odd person
Sex shame
Denial
Some people don’t want their sexual habits to be public
Some people simply value their privacy
All of these reasons are valid! There’s no comfort in airing your dirty laundry to the world. So, submitting on the internet is the solution that many male subs take to secure themselves.
The safest avenue for a submissive male who values anonymity includes signing up to a verified site, using an anonymous username, and not sharing information that’s too personal.
Just because you are a submissive male doesn’t mean that your safety should be compromised.
Overall, you’ll never be able to know if someone is Dominant or submissive just by looking at them. Yes, one can infer, and it’s usually easier to do so with more experience. But, we shouldn’t assume things about people we don’t know.
Instead, you can ask yourself the following questions.
Are you particularly interested in women with authority?
Would you not mind if a partner controlled your relationship and sex life?
Do you want powerful women to Dominate you sexually?
Does the thought of following orders get your dick hard?
When I say “subservience,” does that intrigue you?
Do successful Dommes make you weak at the knees?
Are you horny when a confident woman tells you what to do?
Does the thought of being disciplined turn you on?
If the answer to any of these questions is yes, you may be a submissive man. Welcome to your sexy new world of BDSM. Here’s a masterlist of kinks for you to explore.
The Masculine Desire to Serve Online Dommes
A submissive male is not inherently feminine. What’s effeminate about being a provider, anticipating the needs of your partner, and fulfilling her every desire? If anything, the ability to provide is a strongly masculine trait.
A submissive has a choice when he interacts with online Dommes. He can let his useless ego get the best of him and try to control the situation. Or, he can thrive in an online relationship with a FemDom.
A female led relationship fulfills everyone’s needs. But, if you aren’t willing to relinquish that control, you will never benefit from a FemDom Goddess.
When you approach her, you are the one asking for the favor. If she decides that you are worth the effort, be thankful.
Why Is FemDom So Popular?
On almost every corner of the internet, you can find FemDom. From my observations, it’s getting more popular every year. This could be for a few reasons:
More submissive men are becoming comfortable with the thought of being Dominated.
More women are intrigued at the thought of being in control.
Women are tired of men being in a position of power and express that sexually.
Men are tired of being the ones in control of their jobs, home life, and other responsibilities; leading to them needing an escape.
Female led relationships are hot.
So with Dommes taking back more power, and male subs willingly giving up their power, you get a surge in female dominance. As a dominant woman myself, I have no complaints. 😉
The First Time I Turned the Tables on a Submissive Man
For the longest time, I knew that I was a switch. But, I never got the opportunity to properly dominate a male sub. When I finally got comfortable enough to try it, it was with a man who enjoyed small penis humiliation.
Before we continue, imagine this.
I am a strongly body positive person. It’s hard to get me to call someone ugly, lesser than, disgusting, or a loser. However, once I realized that consent is key, it was a gamechanger.
So, my first time flipping the script on a male submissive changed my entire outlook. It was fun, and he let me explore that dominant side with very little protest.
On the other end of things, I always wanted to dominate men who weren’t naturally submissive. Think, partners “trying something new” in bed or exploring kinks together. There was never a feeling of them being into it, so we stopped pretty quickly.
But, my first experience with a truly subservient man changed my outlook on relationships. I understood that their dedication, eagerness to please, and willingness to follow my commands couldn’t be faked.
I never looked back after that.
Read about my other kinks, fetishes, and preferences.
The Power Dynamic Is Appealing, but How Will You Serve?
Getting back to the power dynamic, how can you tell? If you’re a submissive man, what should you do to express that to a potential Domme?
Here are a few tips:
Messaging every Domme, dick in hand, thinking about all of the ways she’s going to make you blow your load; erase that from your brain.
It’s not about your cock.
The attraction revolves around more than the power dynamic. If you message a Domme, expecting them to please you, you might as well be trying to date in the vanilla world.
No Domme is going to be attracted to yet another man using her as a cum vessel. Put your best foot forward.
Ask yourself:
How will you be useful? What can you do to make her day better and meet her desires? In what ways can you, as a submissive man, show that it’s less about you and more about her?
How my submissives take initiative, show their masculinity, and serve me at the same time:
Picking up my tab on any bill for the month.
Public adoration, especially on Twitter.
Listening to my requests and obeying them completely.
One of my rules is, don’t ask if you aren’t willing to give. A new habit should be giving before asking.
Sending money if my mood seems off for the day.
Anticipating my desires without having to ask.
Allowing me to control parts of their real-life, usually in the form of self-improvement, work success, financial improvement, and being a better, healthier person. (Of course, this all trickles back to me.)
What Do Dominant Females Want From a Male Sub?
When looking for a male sub, Dominant women consider different qualities. Some Domme’s like to focus on physical characteristics, while others like a man who is respectful and obedient.
Before dedicating yourself to the hottest Domme you see search for signs that you are compatible.
Not everyone is into your particular fetishes, so consider that before approaching the wrong FemDom. However, that shouldn’t make you shy away. The best thing you can do is be upfront and ask. Communication is key.
How to Communicate With a New Potential Domme
If you are completely new to the act of submission, your first approach is nerve-wracking. You found a beautiful FemDom Goddess whose authority leaks through the screen. How do you introduce yourself?
Communication tips for new submissive males:
Bad behavior won’t get you anything but the bare minimum and/or blocked.
If you say you’re submissive, act like it. Or, you can simply leave me alone. 🫶🏼— 🦋My FBI Agent Loves My Tits🦋 (@fiestry) November 14, 2023
1. Introduce yourself, and give respect.
Check if she requires a tribute to even begin a conversation. If she does, send before speaking. When you’re ready, a respectful introduction that mentions your particular kinks, preferences, and how you’d like to explore them helps. If you’d like to be more casual or get to know her, be upfront with that as well.
2. Ask questions.
Asking questions does two things.
One, it shows her your interest by making an effort to learn more about her.
Two, you get to gauge whether you two are a good fit.
3. Be honest.
Open communication keeps confusion at bay. If you are upfront about your interests and limits, she’ll understand you better. Like in a regular relationship, keeping secrets (especially if they are essential to play) can potentially damage the Domme/sub dynamic.
4. Listen.
Her responses will tell you everything you should know. To stay on the same page, ask for clarification when needed. When she gives advice or tries to direct you, show that you understand.
5. Be patient.
Depending on the Domme/sub dynamic, think of approaching as the start of a relationship. Trust isn’t instant, nor should it be. Take your time exploring how the two of you get along, and don’t expect for things to be perfect overnight.
