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Category: Advice for Submissive Men and Female Dommes

  • Explore the Truth: Are You a Submissive Male?

    For a submissive male who’s new to the world of BDSM, finding answers is intimidating. Whether or not you are actually a sub is one of the first questions to ask.

    Why do you fantasize about powerful women? Where will this preference lead you? How do you find the right Domme? All of these questions have an answer, and your journey to submission starts here.

    via RedGIFs

    On the bright side, there are millions of excellent resources available to help you explore your kinks. This guide, written by a female Domme in hopes that it crosses paths with an interested male sub, is one of them.

    What Is the Definition of a Submissive Male?

    A submissive male, also known as a “sub”, is a man who prefers to be subservient and obedience to their Domme. The act of submission is a form of BDSM (Bondage/discipline, Dominance/submission, Sadism/masochism).

    A male submissive can come in all shapes and sizes, but it boils down to giving control to the Dominant partner.

    It’s important to realize that submission to a partner does not equal femininity. Can a submissive be feminine? Yes. But, it’s not a requirement to do so. It’s less about the person’s gender identity and more about what they want sexually or in a relationship.

    Anyone who can legally consent is able to submit, regardless of their sexuality or gender identity.

    Is Being Submissive Online Authentic or Fake?

    It is true that submission in real life is nuanced and complex. Think of it in terms of a long distance relationship. Despite there being miles between two partners, they still experience the feelings, commitment, and complexities of a relationship.

    Review from a fan of Fiestry on SextPanther reads: “You’re right. You’re not just a Goddess. You’re something extremely special. Thank you. Thank you.”

    With a long-distance relationship still being valid to the two partners, comparing that to online submission is the easy way to say: Yes, submitting to a Domme virtually is valid. It takes just as much effort, and submissives who enjoy online interactions aren’t fake.

    Most submissive males prefer talking to FemDoms virtually due to privacy, safety, and personal concerns.

    For many, BDSM is taboo. Many people can’t live loud and proud with their kinks for various reasons. Those reasons may include:

    • A career demanding privacy
    • A community (family, friends, etc.) who wouldn’t accept it
    • Fear of being harshly judged or ostracized by their community
    • Fear of disappointing their loved ones
    • They don’t want others to see them as a weak or odd person
    • Sex shame
    • Denial
    • Some people don’t want their sexual habits to be public
    • Some people simply value their privacy

    All of these reasons are valid! There’s no comfort in airing your dirty laundry to the world. So, submitting on the internet is the solution that many male subs take to secure themselves.

    The safest avenue for a submissive male who values anonymity includes signing up to a verified site, using an anonymous username, and not sharing information that’s too personal.

    Just because you are a submissive male doesn’t mean that your safety should be compromised.

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    The Traits of a Submissive Man

    Overall, you’ll never be able to know if someone is Dominant or submissive just by looking at them. Yes, one can infer, and it’s usually easier to do so with more experience. But, we shouldn’t assume things about people we don’t know.

    Instead, you can ask yourself the following questions.

    • Are you particularly interested in women with authority?
    • Would you not mind if a partner controlled your relationship and sex life?
    • Do you want powerful women to Dominate you sexually?
    • Does the thought of following orders get your dick hard?
    • When I say “subservience,” does that intrigue you?
    • Do successful Dommes make you weak at the knees?
    • Are you horny when a confident woman tells you what to do?
    • Does the thought of being disciplined turn you on?

     If the answer to any of these questions is yes, you may be a submissive man. Welcome to your sexy new world of BDSM. Here’s a masterlist of kinks for you to explore.

    The Masculine Desire to Serve Online Dommes

    A submissive male is not inherently feminine. What’s effeminate about being a provider, anticipating the needs of your partner, and fulfilling her every desire? If anything, the ability to provide is a strongly masculine trait.

    A submissive has a choice when he interacts with online Dommes. He can let his useless ego get the best of him and try to control the situation. Or, he can thrive in an online relationship with a FemDom.

    A female led relationship fulfills everyone’s needs. But, if you aren’t willing to relinquish that control, you will never benefit from a FemDom Goddess.

    When you approach her, you are the one asking for the favor. If she decides that you are worth the effort, be thankful.

    Why Is FemDom So Popular?

    On almost every corner of the internet, you can find FemDom. From my observations, it’s getting more popular every year. This could be for a few reasons:

    • More submissive men are becoming comfortable with the thought of being Dominated.
    • More women are intrigued at the thought of being in control.
    • Women are tired of men being in a position of power and express that sexually.
    • Men are tired of being the ones in control of their jobs, home life, and other responsibilities; leading to them needing an escape.
    • Female led relationships are hot.

    So with Dommes taking back more power, and male subs willingly giving up their power, you get a surge in female dominance. As a dominant woman myself, I have no complaints. 😉

    The First Time I Turned the Tables on a Submissive Man

    For the longest time, I knew that I was a switch. But, I never got the opportunity to properly dominate a male sub. When I finally got comfortable enough to try it, it was with a man who enjoyed small penis humiliation.

    Before we continue, imagine this.

    I am a strongly body positive person. It’s hard to get me to call someone ugly, lesser than, disgusting, or a loser. However, once I realized that consent is key, it was a gamechanger.

    So, my first time flipping the script on a male submissive changed my entire outlook. It was fun, and he let me explore that dominant side with very little protest.

    On the other end of things, I always wanted to dominate men who weren’t naturally submissive. Think, partners “trying something new” in bed or exploring kinks together. There was never a feeling of them being into it, so we stopped pretty quickly.

    But, my first experience with a truly subservient man changed my outlook on relationships. I understood that their dedication, eagerness to please, and willingness to follow my commands couldn’t be faked.

    I never looked back after that.

    Read about my other kinks, fetishes, and preferences.

    The Power Dynamic Is Appealing, but How Will You Serve?

    Getting back to the power dynamic, how can you tell? If you’re a submissive man, what should you do to express that to a potential Domme?

    Here are a few tips:

    Messaging every Domme, dick in hand, thinking about all of the ways she’s going to make you blow your load; erase that from your brain.

    It’s not about your cock.

    The attraction revolves around more than the power dynamic. If you message a Domme, expecting them to please you, you might as well be trying to date in the vanilla world.

    No Domme is going to be attracted to yet another man using her as a cum vessel. Put your best foot forward.

    Ask yourself:

    How will you be useful? What can you do to make her day better and meet her desires? In what ways can you, as a submissive man, show that it’s less about you and more about her?

    How my submissives take initiative, show their masculinity, and serve me at the same time:

    • Picking up my tab on any bill for the month.
    • Public adoration, especially on Twitter.
    • Listening to my requests and obeying them completely.
    • One of my rules is, don’t ask if you aren’t willing to give. A new habit should be giving before asking.
    • Sending money if my mood seems off for the day.
    • Anticipating my desires without having to ask.
    • Allowing me to control parts of their real-life, usually in the form of self-improvement, work success, financial improvement, and being a better, healthier person. (Of course, this all trickles back to me.)

    What Do Dominant Females Want From a Male Sub?

    When looking for a male sub, Dominant women consider different qualities. Some Domme’s like to focus on physical characteristics, while others like a man who is respectful and obedient.

    Before dedicating yourself to the hottest Domme you see search for signs that you are compatible.

    Not everyone is into your particular fetishes, so consider that before approaching the wrong FemDom. However, that shouldn’t make you shy away. The best thing you can do is be upfront and ask. Communication is key.

    How to Communicate With a New Potential Domme

    If you are completely new to the act of submission, your first approach is nerve-wracking. You found a beautiful FemDom Goddess whose authority leaks through the screen. How do you introduce yourself?

    Communication tips for new submissive males:

    Bad behavior won’t get you anything but the bare minimum and/or blocked.

    If you say you’re submissive, act like it. Or, you can simply leave me alone. 🫶🏼— 🦋My FBI Agent Loves My Tits🦋 (@fiestry) November 14, 2023

    1. Introduce yourself, and give respect.

    Check if she requires a tribute to even begin a conversation. If she does, send before speaking. When you’re ready, a respectful introduction that mentions your particular kinks, preferences, and how you’d like to explore them helps. If you’d like to be more casual or get to know her, be upfront with that as well.

    2. Ask questions.

    Asking questions does two things.

    • One, it shows her your interest by making an effort to learn more about her.
    • Two, you get to gauge whether you two are a good fit.

    3. Be honest.

    Open communication keeps confusion at bay. If you are upfront about your interests and limits, she’ll understand you better. Like in a regular relationship, keeping secrets (especially if they are essential to play) can potentially damage the Domme/sub dynamic.

    4. Listen.

    Her responses will tell you everything you should know. To stay on the same page, ask for clarification when needed. When she gives advice or tries to direct you, show that you understand.

    5. Be patient.

    Depending on the Domme/sub dynamic, think of approaching as the start of a relationship. Trust isn’t instant, nor should it be. Take your time exploring how the two of you get along, and don’t expect for things to be perfect overnight.

    Adult model fiestry in a white lace bra with cleavage showing

    What I Look for in a Male Submissive

    Are You Ready to Serve?

  • The Verbal Humiliation Submissive Beta Losers Deserve

    Let’s not pretend. As a submissive beta, you know your place in the hierarchy. Not only are you below me, but you’re far below other men as well.

    I sit at the top, and you sit below the trash I toss every day. Why’s that? It’s simple, and I’ll explain soon~

    via RedGIFs

    View It on LoyalFans

    About Shame on You – Beta Loser Humiliation

    Price: $11.99

    Length: 9 minutes

    Description:

    Who are you trying to impress with that ugly beta body? Losers like you need to be knocked down a few pegs. The power exchange between us will be ruthless. You think that you can show me your disgusting body, and I would… lie to you?

    This FemDom clip is also available on:

    Clips4Sale

    Coming Soon to iWantClips

    Beta Bodies Are Gross

    This was a custom video. The submissive beta in question wanted me to rate his body. I’d already given him a dick rating before, and he wanted to go a step further. He knew how to get attention from me: letting me humiliate his disgusting body.

    As a nude FemDom creator, it never crossed my mind to make beta-safe porn.

    While all of my male subs express some sense of inferiority, our play sessions always turned me on. Then, I met my first beta. It was obvious that this man did not deserve pussy.

    Not in a “lock him in chastity and throw away the key” manner. No, we had to take it a step further.

    He’s not allowed to look at tits or pussy. That’s how low on the scale this beta is. At least my cucks get to watch me fuck. Meanwhile, I’d hesitate to send this submissive beta a censored picture of my panties.

    Such is the context of this new video. Beta-safe porn is a necessity now. If I come across another low-tier male such as him, I’ll be prepared next time~

    Do Submissive Men Deserve Pussy?

    Now, that’s quite a question~

    I come across many hot male subs. They’re usually young, hung, and ready to please me. Would I give them pussy? Probably not, but they’re allowed to dream about it.

    Then, I have a couple of favorites. We play often, formed a real relationship, and I could almost call them friends. They never ask for pussy because that’s not what they want. What makes them so special is their daily effort. They want their Goddess to feel worshipped.

    Then, there’s you, beta.

    You fantasize about being my favorite, don’t you? It makes you weak at the knees. Imagine the benefits. My attention, the ability to express your undying adoration, and the perks of playing with a beautiful Goddess.

    Instead, you get rejection.

    Verbal Humiliation.

    Bodyshaming.

    And pure disgust from me.

    It’s your fault for being born that way, I suppose~

  • What Is the Psychology Behind SPH (Small Penis Humiliation?)

    I think it’s a combination of exposure therapy and being one of the easiest ways to humiliate a man. Humiliation in general is a fetish, and SPH is the male-centric version of that.

    via RedGIFs

    Be honest. Would your dick even fit?

    While verbal humiliation is my preference, there are also physical ways to humiliate a person’s smaller dick. CBT is a fun way to share that fetish of yours with a good Domme.

    I’m not trying to generalize, but men are obsessed with their dicks. Even if they think it’s useless, they just want you to talk about it and acknowledge it. I also think that SPH takes the pressure off of them being a “sex god” with a power exchange in the woman’s favor.

    Out of all the SPH guys I’ve met, 1/4 of them didn’t even have a small dick. I’m not sure if they were aware, but who am I to ruin our fun?

    Back when I wasn’t comfortable with Domination, I even tried to reason with a few of them. “You know it’s not actually small, right?” They’d ghost lmfao.

    Now, I’ll let them have it. Fun for everyone. 🤭

  • Are Your Credit Cards Safe When Paying for Porn?

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    Yes. I won’t make you sit through a long introduction for the answer. But, I’ll use the rest of this article to explain why your payment information is safe on reputable porn sites.

    Fraud happens, and so do leaks. This isn’t a guarantee that your credit card will be safe in the hands of paysites. But, I’ll use my 5 years in the adult industry to explain why it probably is.

    Read the table of contents for topics most relevant to you.

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    Why Am I Talking About Credit Card Safety?

    Here’s the short backstory.

    I signed up to Quora. There aren’t many female adult content creators on that social media. So, the majority of questions and answers are between clients who… don’t know what they’re talking about.

    Within a month, my inbox was flooded with one question in particular, but in different formats.

    • “Will an adult content website steal my credit card information?”
    • “How do I avoid hackers on paysites?”
    • “How secure is OnlyFans, LoyalFans, Clips4Sale, etc.?”

    And my personal favorite:

    • “Is my phone safe when I visit porn sites?”

    Obviously, there’s a layer of paranoia surrounding adult paysites. So, I wanted to address it.

    Disclaimer: I’m not a fortune teller. Every website is capable of accidentally leaking data. Mistakes happen.

    Remember when Experian leaked the entire country’s data, or when all of these other major non-adult platforms fumbled our sensitive information? It’s a part of being on the internet.

    Even safe adult sites aren’t immune to data leaks, but I do believe that they take extra precautions. The scrutiny surrounding porn platforms puts them under a microscope.

    They could easily lose the trust of their entire customer base, and that’s what keeps them in check.

    How to Differentiate Unsafe vs. Safe Porn Sites

    While I reasonably trust all of these adult platforms with my brand, I’m aware of the underlying issue. It is possible to stumble across a sketchy website.

    MacAfee has a great article about how to distinguish safe vs. unsafe websites, but I’ll go over the main points here.

    These sketchy characteristics should raise your alarm bells:

    • It looks lazily thrown together.
    • There are 1 million ads, especially pop-ups.
    • It asks you to download things that you did not ask or pay for.
    • If you do put in information (such as an email address), your inbox fills with irrelevant spam.
    • Too-good-to-be-true discounts on expensive items

    IMPORTANT: When you download a video from a website, the file should be .MP3 or .MOV. Other common video file formats may pop up. However, it should never be a .EXE file.

    A .EXE file is meant to make changes to your device. You’ll often see it with app downloads, programs, software, etc. It is not a video file. If you think you’re downloading a video and get a .EXE file instead, do not open it.

    Safe websites should have a few key features.

    Firstly, an SSL certificate with “https://” is essential.

    The alternative “http://” is not secure. If you put your information into a URL with “http://“, it’s easy for third parties to steal anything that you type on that site.

    At the very least, the domain name should be spelled correctly.

    If you’re surfing PornHub for example, and you notice that the domain name says PronHub, that is not the same website. It is fake. Hackers take advantage of misspelled domain names to steal your information.

    Paysites I Trust With My Information

    Since I’ve been in the adult industry for 5 years, I have never had an issue with my paysites. In fact, I’ve had more problems with Facebook and Twitter’s shady privacy policies.

    The trusted adult sites that I use regularly include:

    • iWantClips
    • Clips4Sale
    • LoyalFans
    • SextPanther*

    Click the Buttons for My Official Profiles

    LoyalFans

    iWantClips

    Clips4Sale

    SextPanther

    Most of my paysites are old. Clips4Sale is 20 years old. SextPanther was founded 9 years ago, and iWantClips is 13 years old.

    LoyalFans is the newest at 4 years old. That made me skeptical at first, but other creators convinced me of their legitimacy. I’m glad that they did. It’s my favorite premium subscription platform!

    My logic is that their longevity means something. If they survived this long through multiple financial crises, then they know how to encrypt our data.

    ” I’d say that the porn industry has helped pioneer things like video streaming and online payment services, and they don’t want to do things that hurt their businesses. They’ve invested a lot in keeping sites secure.”

    Stephen Cobb in The San Diego Tribune

    *Note: SextPanther had issues with a breach in the past. However, they were not hacked. The leaked (model, not client) information was found by penetration testers and not seen by the general public. I talk about it more in my SextPanther review.

    Keep in mind…

    I’m not just sharing credit card information with these paysites.

    They need my full name and driver’s license to prove that I’m of legal age. My social security number, address, and other personal information are required for tax purposes. Some of these NSFW platforms require a photo of a utility bill to prove where we live.

    Adult content creators who use trusted paysites are age verified.

    That matters. It’s not realistic or safe to give my fans this sensitive information. Safe porn sites do the heavy lifting by verifying every creator.

    It’s safer to use a verified adult platform to pay for porn. Unverified creators who use PayPal are just as risky as a sketchy paysite.

    Why I Take Safety Seriously as an Adult Content Creator

    As an adult content creator, I spend a lot of time vetting new paysites.

    I do not compromise when it comes to my safety. My logic is, how can I expect my viewers, fans, and subs to sign up for a website that I don’t trust?

    When it comes to safety, that’s essential for us. We hear horror stories about being stalked, harassed, and killed through the grapevine. Even Amouranth was stalked once upon a time.

    The stakes are a bit higher than credit card information for us. So, we have to be sure that a website won’t get us in deep trouble.

    How to Vet a Paysite

    Adult content creators and the people who buy from us can both learn something here.

    This is a lot of work for fans, clients, and viewers. I want to explain my process for two reasons.

    Firstly, I’d like for you to know that I don’t sign up for any adult site. I take special care to prove the legitimacy of my platforms. I this is too much work for you personally, know that I put in the effort.

    Basically, the links I send you are vetted. If I send you something, it’s legitimate to the best of my knowledge.

    Secondly, it’s to protect your data. Clicking suspicious links is risky. You have to know what’s safe and what isn’t. If this inspires you to be a bit more careful, I’ve done my due diligence.

    Here’s where I start my vetting process:

    • Are they legitimate?
    • Are models that I know using it?
    • How old are they?
    • Who owns them?
    • Are there any sources about them that don’t come from the website itself? (Forbes, feature articles, etc.)
    • Do they have traffic, and what’s their traffic source?
    • What country is the website hosted in? (Find this on WHOIS.)
    • Who is their payment processor?

    Since OnlyFans got popular, scam fansites popped up in its midst. Most of them are a quick cash grab, and the risk leans towards the models.

    For example, Pocketstars (now known as Fansify) seemed like a legitimate site. However, they stopped paying adult creators and no longer communicate honestly with the community. ExtraLunchMoney pulled a similar trick.

    What makes me suspicious of a paysite:

    • It’s under 2 years old.
    • The content of the site focuses on performer sign-ups instead of selling to clients.
    • There is no age verification.
    • They ask adult creators to pay instead of clients.
    • Badmouthing creators on social media. (Yes, this happens.)
    • Little to no social media presence.

    Basically, the red flags fly high and bright. A poorly managed website costs creators and members in the long run. It’s better to go with older, trustworthy brands.

    Is Your Credit Card Safe on Premium Porn Sites?

    To wrap things up, yes. Finding a trustworthy porn site is key. Don’t enter your payment information into new, sketchy paysites.

    Avoid diving so deep that you’re on the dark side of the internet, and you’ll be fine. So far, my “green flag” sites are:

    • LoyalFans
    • Streamate
    • Clips4Sale
    • iWantClips
    • Chaturbate
    • ModelHub
    • SkyPrivate
    • SextPanther

    Note: This is my experience as a model on these pay-to-play sites. For issues on the client end, I can’t answer those questions.

    Quick Tip: It’s possible to look up reviews on Trustpilot or Scam Advisor to see what clients are saying.

    Thank you for reading!

    Hopefully, this makes you feel a bit safer on my side of the internet. Don’t let sex shame and paranoia stop you from being your kinkiest true self. If you want to pay for porn, you deserve to relax while doing so.

    I’ll answer any questions in the comments about common scams, catfishing, or whatever else. To see more of me, click the black buttons.

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    About the Author – Goddess Fiestry

    Thank you for reading my blog.

    Much like writing, Female Domination is my creative outlet. I use kink as a way to express my sexuality. As I spend time building my influence, new subs make their way to me.

    So, here’s a more about Goddess Fiestry & my blog:

    • 6 years as an NSFW content creator
    • 200+ FemDom clips created in 2022/2023
    • A strong interest in chastity, cuckold, gooning, humiliation, and other hot kinks
    • Top 6% on LoyalFans frequently
    • Frequently top 500 on SextPanther

    I write opinions, guides on what I know, new clip updates, and whatever else catches my fancy. If you’d like free updates, my newsletter is for you.

    More About Goddess Fiestry

  • Is It Possible to Be Masculine and Submissive? – Goddess Fiestry

    In short: Yes, it is possible to be masculine and submissive.

    Submission is not a feminine trait. Masculinity is not defined by whether or not a person is Dominant. Topping and bottoming are separate from all four.

    via RedGIFs

    It is possible to maintain your masculinity while being a submissive man. I look at that type of submission in the context of being subservient towards your partner. Tending to your partner’s needs, anticipating them, and serving them in a way that brings their feminine traits out.

    Masculinity and femininity complement each other well. It’s about finding that energy within yourself and sharing that with a partner.

    How Would I Bring Masculine Traits Out of a Submissive Man?

    It’s up to the confines of your individual relationship. Discuss everything with your sub.

    But, if you’re looking for examples, I can tell you what I do.

    I like to set mantras, self-care routines, and acts of services for my submissives.

    They’d speak or write their mantras, usually revolving around me or our relationship. I also like to sprinkle in self-love and adoration to build up their mental health.

    For self-care routines, that’s a strong preference of mine. I don’t want someone to get so deep into their obsession that they stop taking care of themselves. For submissive men, I think this is essential. Daily showers, a skincare routine, keeping their room tidy, grooming, etc.

    Acts of service are my favorite. I enjoy the thoughtfulness put into every action. My best boys usually do this of their own volition, but I like to tell them to do at least one thing daily that benefits me. That could be anything from public adoration to paying for my dinner. It’s the thought that counts.

    I don’t like to jump into all of this instantly. This is a lot of work to set up, and it takes dedication for both parties. Only a very select few get these privileges, and it’s because we built our relationship up to that point.

    How Do I Express My Feminine Traits While Still Being Dominant?

    Female Domination is not a sexuality. It is a preference and a way to approach intimacy in the context of relationships and sex. You’ve got it backwards if you think anythings making us do FemDom.

    Female Dominance differs from woman to woman. It’s about our desires, needs, preferences. Once we start prioritizing ourselves, it happens naturally.

    In a female led relationship, it may look different than it does in porn. A lot of hardcore mainstream porn is male-centric due to the target audience. Submissive men, especially those with a bit of experience, understand that it’s all about her.

  • How Much Money Do Adult Content Creators Earn Through OnlyFans Subscriptions?

    Last I heard, OnlyFans creators below the top 20–30% aren’t making much money.

    The average OnlyFans creator according to Follower Co makes $180 monthly. Another source says that the average is more like $151. That’s a stark difference between them and top OnlyFans creators.

    It’s more than likely because it’s filled to the brim with creators with a low follower count.

    At one point (before I deleted it), I remember making a random $20, and it put me in the top 70%. This was a year and a half ago, and I’m sure the gap has widened with new signups and models at the top getting richer.

    via RedGIFs

    So, I can say for sure that a decent chunk of creators aren’t even making enough money to even go out to eat.

    Even when I hit 3k followers on Twitter, I wasn’t pulling in more than 30 OnlyFans subscribers in all per month.

    If we consider that a 1% conversion rate, then another OnlyFans creator with 300 Twitter followers would have 3 subscribers. At $5 per month, that’s $15 in subscription profit, not counting PPV, unlocks, and tips.

    Instagram’s conversion rate is much better. So, if we bump that up to 3% (conservative), then 300 Insta followers at 3% conversions would be 9 subscribers or $45 per month in subscription revenue.

    Obviously, that’s not set in stone and would vary, depending on:

    OnlyFans is one of the few adult platforms that doesn’t have internal discoverability. You have to click external links to find somebody’s specific page.

    So, despite its 320 million monthly visits, not all creators get to benefit. If you aren’t able to convert, you’re SOL.

    Once I hit 8k followers and saw my other sites making great money with OF still stagnant, I deleted it. It’s not a great site for starting from the very bottom.

  • Sex Work, NSFW, and Social Media Bans

    TLDR: We need it to make money, and freedom of speech is being squeezed tighter every year.

    I answered this question on Quora first.

    Options Outside of Social Media:

    • RedGifs
    • Sharesome
    • A Website – We have communities of sex workers and Dommes who host their own websites.
    • PornHub
    • XHamster
    • XVideos
    • ArouseVIP – The site has changed over time.
    • Sex.com
    • AmberCutie Forum

    via RedGIFs

    It’s what a lot of sex workers use to make money. Many SW’s, especially newbies, don’t have the marketing experience to understand how to draw traffic from other channels.

    It’s an easy way to keep in touch with followers and update them on our latest ventures. Plus, social media does bring in new clients.

    It also gives us a space to easily interact with our peers since not many people shout “I’m a sex worker, and I need friends” in public.

    “Twitter users will no longer be able to link to certain rival social media websites, including what the company described Sunday as “prohibited platforms” Facebook, Instagram and Mastodon.” – Quote From PBS

    My biggest concern is, it won’t stop at sex workers. Internet censorship has been on a fast track this last few years, and it’s not going to stop until someone cracks down. Right now, almost all of our politicians are happy to restrict sex workers without a second thought as to what that means for the rest of society.

    We’re just the scapegoat. Everyone cheers when the whores are losing and ignore the freedom of speech aspect of the issue.

    If we’re getting banned for doing legal work, who do you think is next? Freedom of speech violations won’t stop at sex workers. We’re just how they test the waters to see what they can get away with.

    For example, everyone cheered at the SESTA/FOSTA law being passed under the guise of protecting children and human trafficking victims.

    But, the hidden aspect of the new law is:

    1. Websites being legally liable for what users post.
    2. Websites can be punished for user content that was posted before the law passed.
    3. Your right to online privacy died with this law. Because of it, Cloud Storage monitors your files, email providers scan your emails, private messages are monitored by the site and/or government; everything that occurs online is monitored.
    4. The law doesn’t have clear language, and because of that, sites and social media reacted by overextending their reach to shadowban or restrict all offensive content (Freedom. Of. Speech.)
    5. Making it harder for sex workers to screen clients, resulting in more deaths, targeted harrassment, and assaults.
    6. Increased sex trafficking because full service sex workers had to go back to pimps or were coerced by people who targeted their desperation.
    7. The “target” of the law was sex traffickers, but *everyone* felt the hit when Craigslist personals, some subreddits, adult-oriented crypto, some dating websites, Google Drive accounts, and dozens of other online services shut down or started restricting their services.

    I also read an article years ago about SESTA/FOSTA making it harder for the FBI to track child sex trafficking, but I cannot find it again. Instead of “eliminating” the issue, they just pushed the criminals deeper into the cracks.

    What’s my point? Social media is one of the last safe platforms for sex workers to fairly easily make money, especially inexperienced or new ones.

    If it ever falls, then there will more than likely be an increase in pimps, sex trafficking, homelessness, etc among SW’s; and I am assuming this because of the data collected from the results of SESTA/FOSTA.

    Yes, we will move on to the next site, and the next one, and the next one at first. I even bought a domain and started doing brand deals, collect ad revenue, affiliate marketing, and I’m an investor with a high-yield savings account.

    But, I’m 24. The 19-year-old who got kicked out of her house and lives in hotels probably doesn’t understand how to hedge her money like that. And, she literally can’t because she’d have to choose between hedging or eating.

    It starts with the whores. When it will be you who’s on the other end of discrimination? Probably sooner than you think.

    Note: I tried to make this as clear as possible, but a lot of this is off the top of my head and written very quickly. I was there during SESTA/FOSTA, but that was 4 years ago. I’ll come back later to double check everything I said.

  • Where Can You Find New LoyalFans Followers? – Adult Content Creators

    Use My Referral Code to Sign Up

    I’m assuming you mean where can you find LoyalFans followers?

    The platform has internal discoverability. If you’re active, posting, going live, etc.; they are pushing you to their internal traffic.

    Unlike OnlyFans, you don’t have to grind on social media to grow a following (but it does help!). Also, *followers* on LF are free, and *subscribers* are the ones who see your paid content.

    via RedGIFs

    Using my profile as an example, I’ll tell you how to convert impressions into followers:

    1. Have a clear, detailed, and well-written profile. It should include your body type, kinks/fetishes, and special little tidbits about you. Be unique and interesting.
    2. Your pinned post should include additional information as well as a short, *unsatisfying* teaser.
    3. Have the *occassional* free post to give them a reason to scroll your page.
    4. Don’t forget that you can link your posts to each other internally. Keep viewers on your page for more than a couple of seconds, and they’re more likely to engage.
    5. Use hashtags. Do your research on the most effective ones on LoyalFans, especially since it’s mostly kink/fetish/FemDom-based.
    6. Post consistently, and don’t act like a bot. My fans love to read whatever fantasy I brewed up that day. Take advantage of your ability to use your words, and get creative.
    7. Offer an incentive for followers and subscribers.

    On top of all of these, be consistent. I post daily because I’m a psycho workaholic, but be clear with your followers. Will you post daily, a couple of times a week, monthly? Let them know!

  • Premium Sexting: Best Paid Sites to Share Your Fantasies

    Not everybody is brave enough to share their naughty kinks and fetishes face to face. So, what’s the next best thing? Premium sexting sites are the perfect, anonymous way to find a sexting partner fast.

    Sending a dirty text is the best way to communicate your sexual desires.

    via RedGIFs

    Who doesn’t love sexting? It’s surprisingly intimate, passes the time when you’re bored, and you get to dive deep into a fantasy. You get to explore yourselves and each other without the full pressure of a sexual encounter.

    There are plenty of websites to look for a quick dirty chat. But the top premium sexting sites for men include:

    – Jerkmate

    – OnlyFans

    – SextPanther

    – Arousr

    – Free Cams (Chaturbate, StripChat, Streamate)

    The Benefits of Free vs. Paid Sexting

    A lot of men turn up their noses at the thought of paying. That’s valid! You want to feel desirable enough for women to want you without your money involved. 

    But, I want to emphasize that it’s not about desire, or your levels of attractiveness, or you as a person. The benefits of free vs. paid sexting are simple when you put it in the right perspective.

    • You want somebody to text *now*.

    If you’re in a rush and don’t have a partner, it’s hard to find women to sext. You have to hop on Tinder, Bumble, or any other dating site; go through that nightmare; and when you finally get a match, she’s not down for anything immediate.

    Premium sexting is a way to get what you want fast. Most adult content creators offer sexting services, and it’s as easy as clicking a button. 

    • Experience with kinks, fetishes, and fantasies.

    You may have found a partner to sext, but is she in the mood? Does she share the same sexual quirks as you? Did she reject one of your more kinky offers?

    Models who offer pay-to-sext are lenient, and they usually include a list of kinks and fetishes on their bio or tip menu. You don’t have to guess what she’s into. It’s right there in an easy-to-read format.

    Also, her experience with the kink or fetish could introduce you to something new and sexy. She doesn’t have to fake it for your sake.

    • No strings attached sexting

    When two people spend a lot time getting to know each other, things happen. This causes a lot of anxiety for people who just want to have fun. If things between you and your old texting partner, premium sexting might be the better option.

    Professional adult content creators avoid catching feelings. They won’t start blowing up your phone asking where you’ve been or who you’re with. Outside of targeted messages to get you to come back for a fun time, they most likely won’t bother you. 

    • Note: If you’re looking to build a relationship, paid sexts aren’t the right call.

    On the other hand, there is the possibility for you to catch feelings. No strings attached goes both ways. It’s okay to foster a genuine connection to boost the fantasy, but it shouldn’t be taken too far. If you’re going to use pay-to-play adult sites, the professionalism goes both ways. 

    How to Use OnlyFans to Sext Online

    One of the top paid websites for a quick sexting session is OnlyFans. While it’s common for users to subscribe, scroll, and log off; there’s the possibility to get more out of your subscription.

    When it comes to It’s easy to use, and popular, and most women on the site offer free or paid sexts. You can initiate, and they’ll immediately get the message. No bullshit or beating around the bush; send a quick xxx message any of your favorite OnlyFans girls.

    However, a strong fear exists in many members. They’re worried that the model isn’t who she says she is, and it’s a possibility. It’s common for OnlyFans girls with huge followings to hire management companies or assistants to answer their messages. Soon, I’ll show you ways to bypass your fears and prove you’re speaking to the real model.

    If OnlyFans isn’t your thing, read about more options below.

    SextPanther: The Fast Sexting Site With Real Pornstars

    Plenty of xxx websites let you sext online. But, it’s about finding the quickest, best session for your money. For example, my favorite site is SextPanther where I share my naughty fantasies with other horny members.

    On SextPanther, you and the model (usually a popular pornstar!) share texts, videos, audio, and pictures. It’s great for getting in touch with highly desired women whose inboxes are flooded due to their popularity.

    When you deliver a message on SP, you get to the top of an SP creator’s DM’s for fast replies, and she sees that you’re serious about her.

    Learn more about how to approach models on SextPanther.

    Fiestry profile on SextPanther reads: 24 & 5’3 switch ❗️ SIZE QUEEN❗️big tits & a big ass. Cucks, betas, human wallets, and losers are welcome to test their luck 🤭 Dirty talk, playful & mean teasing, roleplay, SPH, CEI, JOI, cheating fantasy, chastity, edging 😈 Love to chat & send audio. 👅 Custom videos & dick ratings OPEN. Add me & send a message now.

    Why do I consider SextPanther to be a great option for a quick, dirty chat? Every piece of media that is shared, you get to keep. If you like to collect nudes or xxx videos, they stay on your account forever. Unlike Snapchat, you get to look back on your old nudes and enjoy them forever.

    The majority of the pornstars and camgirls are fetish and kink friendly too. I’m included in that list. I love the freaks; they’re the most fun.

    Every camgirl, pornstar, and adult content creator is a 100% verified model via ID. They also need a decent social media following for approval. For example, they approved me (I assume!) because of my RedGifs Creator of the Month title, as well as my decent following on Twitter, Chaturbate, and ManyVids. Because of those rules, there’s a higher ratio of real adult stars on SextPanther, compared to other pay to sext websites.

    To me, that makes it one of the best sexting sites for men with particular fetishes, nude collectors, and casual chatters.

    How to Prove She’s a Real Pornstar on SextPanther

    As far as I know, few girls use management agencies on this pay-to-sext site. While *I* personally, don’t, I can’t speak for everyone. Here are some ways to prove that she’s real:

    • Ask her for an audio message saying your username
    • Request a homemade “in-the-moment” clip
    • Ask her for custom porn
    • Hop in a phone sex session or video call
    • Relax, and realize that 100% of the horny girls on SP are ID verified (it’s the law) and ready for you.

    Do Verified Models Use Other Sexting Sites?

    While SextPanther is a place to reach me fast, I also sext on LoyalFans. Most other models and I allow subscribers to message for free. In this case, it may be a cheaper option for committed sexters.

    If you don’t want a premium subscription just to send a sext online, most LoyalFans creators allow their free followers to chat. Whatever your preference, there’s an option out there catered for you.

    Do You Recommend Other Sexting Sites?

    While SextPanther is one of the best sexting websites, I have heard of others. Some I can recommend, and others I have no experience. I will not recommend a site that I’m inexperienced with, but I can point you in the right directly. However, they all seem trustworthy if you’re concerned about privacy.

    (Reminder: Trustpilot is your friend.)

    Using ManyVids for Premium Sexting

    Selling sexting services on ManyVids is less popular, but it’s possible. You can navigate to an MV Girl’s Items Store if you want to check for what she offers. I’ve only sexted a handful of guys there, so I’m not sure if that should be your first choice.

    Arousr, Adult Friend Finder, and Jerkmate

    When it comes to other sexting websites, I’ve personally never signed up for them. I’m unsure of their user experience or how guys feel about them. However, I am adding their names here just in case they interest you.

    You might see something you like, who knows!

    Live Camgirls Ready to Sext Now

    Do you want to elevate your xxx messaging? Live cams support 100% anonymous sexting online, and you physically see exactly who you’re talking to.

    While live cams aren’t specifically for sending sexts online, finding the right camgirl is life-changing. I suggest finding a room with fewer viewers, so you get the benefit of one-on-one attention.

    There is an option on every live camsite to take the women to a private session. While she does her naughty thing, you can put dirty words in her chatroom to encourage her.

    My favorite site is Chaturbate. As a camgirl, I love entertaining a room full of guys, but I don’t mind if one takes me to private. The one-on-one feels more intimate, and it’s sexier that way. It’s easier to focus on one guy’s kinks, and more fun to explore each other.

    Watch live girls on Chaturbate here.

    Models, Camgirls, Pornstars, and Content Creators; Sign up for SextPanther

    If you’re interested in signing up for SextPanther as a model, pornstar, camgirl, or content creator; click my referral link. It doesn’t take any money out of your pocket, but it is a simple way to tell me thank you for the suggestion. 🙂

    Keep in mind: SP wants you to have a good adult-oriented following before they’ll accept you. If you’ve grown a social media, OnlyFans, PornHub, or other adult website; you should good approved. However, sometimes they reject people for reasons unknown. I’m happy to discuss it with you before you sign up.

  • Male Service Subs: How You Make Yourself Useful

    Update: 2/22/2025 – Scroll to the video editing portion

    As a male service sub, it’s 100% possible to be useful. Women have needs, and it’s your life’s purpose to fulfill them.

    One of two types of submissive men are reading this. Whether you’re one or the other depends on the intention behind your “acts of service”.

    My inbox is filled to the brim with eager service-oriented submissive men. You all want a piece of Goddess, but my presence is limited. I spend my time on the submissive men who earned it.

    Coming soon…

    The ones who waste their first impression on “hi” get ignored.

    Quit wasting my time on useless “acts of service”. The ones who are eager to please understand exactly what I’m saying. Here, you’ll get the keys to the castle.

    Read the table of contents for tips and tricks on how to actually serve a female Domme.

    via RedGIFs

    My FemDom Pet Peeve: Male “Service” Subs

    There is the male service-oriented submissive, and then there are “service” subs.

    The difference is start. One is a good boy who enjoys pleasing women. He craves the ability to serve women. In fact, he doesn’t think he deserves her attention until he commits an act of service.

    You say that you’re ready to serve until you meet a Goddess like me~

    It’s such a sweet way to think.

    You take the time out of your day to do something that’s important to her. The thought of failing at that task genuinely makes you anxious. It’s all about pleasing her, and it’s equally sexy as it is beautiful.

    The “service” subs have a different strategy.

    They see all of this FemDom content online. Eventually, they stumble across a Goddess whose image is perfect for his weakling male fantasy.

    Is he even submissive, or is he obsessed with jerking off to mean women?

    Eventually, he has the audacity to be a timewaster, offering something useless and irrelevant. Never money. Always something that benefits him more than her.

    The focus is not on truly helping her. Rather, it revolves around jerking off and cumming. There is zero value in that, and it’s annoying to have to deal with.

    What Counts As Acts of Service to a Goddess?

    I can only use myself as an example. Other Dommes and Goddesses have different preferences.

    So, what do I find useful?

    To me, the most satisfying thing any man can do is save me time. Every minute of my day is accounted for. Being a timewaster has negative value. But, gifting time is an act of service that brings true value to me.

    What are the biggest time-suckers for me?

    • Forgetting important things until last-minute.
    • Research for my blog and social media
    • Organizing
    • Market analysis and data logging
    • When I’m burnt out, creating captions and video ideas

    ADHD Dommes are real. We’re still hot. We just can’t remember shit, or we procrastinate. :’)

    A List of Skills That I Would Find Useful

    • SEO
    • Marketing
      • Especially A/B Testing
    • Teaching and Learning
      • Especially sorting out equations
    • Proofreading
    • Reading Analytics and Data
    • *coughs and whispers* (((DataScraping)))
    • Understands Coding Languages (HTML, Python, Java, etc.)
    • Market Research
    • Investing (Stocks, ETF’s, etc.)
    • Finding Holes in My Strategies (Respectfully, of course~)
    • Finding Mistakes on My Pages
    • Creativity and Brainstorming
    • Sometimes, I don’t know what I need until I see it. Present yourself with a respectful inquiry. I may find something for you that you wouldn’t have thought of without my God-like creativity.

    Are you reading anything in this list and think, “Hey, I actually know how to do that.”? I’m talking to you. Let’s chat. 😉

    I’m waiting~ Come inside.

    Reach Out on LoyalFans

    Notice what’s not in there? Cleaning, cooking, being a piece of furniture, or doing something for the purpose of you jerking off.

    If you want me to fulfill the fantasy in your head, pay for it.

    Otherwise, don’t pretend to be serving me.

    What Does Not Count as an Act of Service?

    A male “service sub” offering “services” for the purpose of jerking off and not completing the task.

    I have a recent example.

    A brand new sub recently approached me, zero tribute in hand, and said this:

    “Greetings Goddess, I’m a Video Editing/Graphic Design slave, I can edit videos, design any kind of graphics, or work on anything visuals/tech related! Here is a list of stuff I can do: -edit videos -make previews -subtitle videos -design menus -banners -posters -watermarks(or any graphics) Please let me know if you or anyone else requires any of my services for anything at all! Thank you so much for your time Goddess!”~ Quoth From a True Loser

    Here are the issues I have with this sterling inquiry:

    • I didn’t express any need for a video editing or graphic design slave.

    I do spend hours editing my best FemDom videos, but it’s for a reason. My style is specific, hard to replicate, and has a certain flow.

    Update: 2/22/2025 – Somebody read this blog post and came up with the sweetest idea. It worked. Unfortunately, you have a group of people who love stealing ideas, and who actively tried to destroy the quality of my content.

    You should keep an eye out for whoever that is – definitely a programmer – and watch your back. Because they are actively trying to blame you for having perfect code.

    I’d hate for that to affect your job.

    It could be a simple copyright issue, but I see it being lawsuit level due to the damages I and other models have suffered.

    Everyone who’s a reputable author signs their name. This person purposefully removes their name and messes up the program. <3

    Contact Me

    Intro to Goon is my best example. It took 6 hours to edit. The payoff was fantastic because it sold 100x more than my average FemDom clip. But, I do not think that a random sub could pull this off.

    It’s true that I don’t always have the energy to create a clip this detailed. That’s not my point. I’m saying that once the creativity starts flowing, it does not stop until I’m satisfied with the results.

    I’m never afraid to be weird, out of the ordinary, or shocking. That’s a big part of my creativity. The creative process is my favorite part about creating FemDom content.

    Therefore, I have no need for a video editing and graphic design slave.

    Alongside writing and creating random stories for videos, that’s my favorite part. Why would I let a random slave have the fun? Ew.

    • Subtitles are an important thing that my FemDom clips lack, but that would require he watch them for free.

    I type over 170+ WPM with near perfection.

    Adding subtitles to my videos is something that I’m capable of. On top of that, I used to work for a captioning company that will subtitle my videos for cheap, and that’s what I intend to use when it feels right.

    There is no reason to trust a random sub with my content. We have never spoken before. Anyone can label themselves as a “video editing and graphic design slave” to get free content.

    • Where the hell was his portfolio?

    Speaking of anyone being able to call themselves a service slave, here’s my big point. He had no portfolio. His Twitter was private. Only one brand new Domme recommended him, and he designed her Twitter banner. (I didn’t like it.)

    I shouldn’t have to hold your hand while you make a pitch.

    A professional video editor and graphic designer would know to have a portfolio ready at the snap of a finger. That’s what I do as a writer, but perhaps common sense is rare nowadays.

    • I have never talked to this random man.

    The ability to serve me is a privilege earned over time.

    I am a control freak. It’s why I love Dominating men who are incapable of controlling themselves.

    To put it simply, I don’t trust anyone with anything valuable. That’s something that needs to be proven with obedience, dedication, and a will to serve.

    So far, only one of hundreds have pulled that off, and I still give him tiny tasks that I monitor closely with detailed instructions.

    He made it a solid point to express his competence. It took me 4 weeks to give him an actual task that would bring value to my life, and it made him so happy that I decided to do so. I’m getting off topic, but I <3 praising my good competent boy.

    His reply to my points? Let’s read.

    No Goddess… I’m a broke college sub so I can’t serve dommes financially, therefore I try and be of any use I can by offering my services, however I won’t be able to buy the videos Goddess I’m sorryQuoth from a Broke True Loser

    He did not offer to:

    • Prove himself with smaller tasks
    • Earn my trust
    • Show me a portfolio
    • Send a small tribute as a happy medium (I say this like I’d be willing to compromise, but I probably wouldn’t lol.)
    • Give me something more valuable

    He simply rolled over and proved to me that he was useless. *gag*

    Are You Addicted to “Good Boy?”

    Hopefully, my short guide taught you something new. Or, it inspired you. 😉

    Acts of service are excellent.

    But, you’re reading the words of a Goddess who controls every aspect of her tightly booked life. Why would I give up a little piece of control to satiate a man’s dick? Ew.

    If you want to prove yourself as a truly useful male service sub, I’m all ears.

    There are small things to do to please me, and larger things. It depends on your level of competence, our mutual trust, and time spent together.

    Will you disappear if I don’t answer for a week?

    Do you need constant timewasting attention that does nothing for me?

    Will you be gone in a month, moving on to the next Domme who will give you a sliver of attention?

    ~Stay away from me. I do not want you as a service submissive.~

    You’re welcome to approach as a temporary plaything, but be honest. You will not earn the ability to truly serve me until I deem you competent, reliable, and consistent.

    Are You Willing to Serve Financially, but Don’t Have the Money?

    First of all, if you truly can’t afford a $20 tribute, you need to get off of the internet.

    I’ve talked about this before, but Financial Domination isn’t about huge tributes for me. To me, it’s about the aspect of control. If a finsub makes sacrifices for me, then $20 can be just as hot as a bigger send.

    Don’t use that as an excuse to only send small, and listen to the point. It’s about the time that you put into that $20.

    What’s that send worth to you? 2 hours of your life, gone straight to my bank account? Then it’s hot.

    Do you beg for payday to come sooner, so you can earn 2 minutes of conversation with me? You tribute, get small talk out of me, can’t afford more, and repeat every week? That type of devotion is hot as fuck too.

    Here are some financial ways to serve your Goddess. Remember that it’s all about the obedience, the sacrifice, and the dedication towards serving me:

    • Sign up for a survey app. Use it in your free time, and give me the money.
    • Would you usually spend your night relaxing and watching TV? Sacrifice that time to DoorDash and UberEats, and tribute your tips.
    • If you send a small tribute, beg to send me more.
    • Is your FinDom addiction paired with an exposure fetish? Hop on a camsite like Chaturbate, and give me the tokens you earn.
    • A daily coffee send means a lot, and it’s the best way to let me see that you think about me every morning.
    • You can Google “side hustle” or “make money online” and find a million other ideas.

    Do You Lack Any Useful Skills? That’s the Point of Having Money.

    The fake male service submissive has one goal: Get out of spending money.

    That is never going to please a woman. Being concerned with the status of your cock will get you blocked.

    If you have zero useful skills, there is one true way to please a Goddess.

    Tributes are the only option for you. Otherwise, you’re hopping from Domme to Domme, begging for attention that you do not deserve.

    And you wonder why you’re so lonely?

    Unfulfilled?

    You wonder why you can’t find the perfect Goddess girlfriend?

    Look in the mirror, and quit being a bitch. Get another job, a side hustle, start investing; and start serving. Otherwise, you do not exist to me.

    Quit Being Useless. Tribute and Serve.